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From Shame to Fame: Turning Life’s Toughest Emotion into Your Strongest Power (12)

Shame is that uncomfortable feeling that tells us we are somehow not good enough. It is different from guilt, which is about what we did. Shame attacks who we think we are. It shows up when we believe we have failed, disappointed others, or simply not matched the invisible standards set by society. Sometimes it is earned through mistakes, but many times it is unfairly placed on us, even when our intentions and actions were right.

The trouble is that if you let shame move in and make itself at home, it quickly becomes a terrible houseguest. It lowers your energy, pulls down your consciousness, and before you know it, you are in a spiral of negative thoughts and feelings. It is like putting on noise-cancelling headphones tuned only to self-doubt. Progress feels distant, and opportunities slip by because you are stuck replaying the same mental soundtrack.

But shame might not the strong villain it first appears to be. When you step back and see it as just one of many emotions we will feel in our lives, it loses its power. It may be unpleasant, but it can also be the medicine that pushes us in the right direction. Sometimes the bravest move is to be a little shameless, as long as your intentions are honest. That shift from hiding to owning your story can be the start of a completely new future.

And here is where resilience is built. If your intentions are right and you face shame but learn to stand tall through it, you become unshakable. Very little can throw you off balance after that. This resilience is what sets the stage for real Fame, not the shallow kind measured in likes, but the deeper kind where people respect your strength and authenticity.

Look at The Pursuit of Happyness. Chris Gardner, played by Will Smith, endured moments that would break most people. Sleeping in a subway restroom with his son would make anyone feel humiliated. Yet instead of letting shame define him, he used it as fuel. His story proves that resilience through shame can lead not only to personal success but also to inspiring millions.

By learning to manage shame, you protect and even strengthen your mental health. You stop spiraling downward and start expanding upward. You gain perspective, clarity, and a stronger sense of self. That is the real prize.

So yes, your relationship with Shame can be the foundation of Fame. Not because shame feels good, but because overcoming it makes you ready for the spotlight that life has in store for you.

And while it might still feel a little taboo to talk about topics like shame, it is exactly these conversations that matter. Addressing them openly is how we strengthen individual mental health and move society forward in a positive direction.

❤️ASB

The Sales Journey starts – “You can’t do it”- That’s Wonderful!

I came across a nice LinkedIn post from an individual sometime ago where he listed down an array of demotivators thrown at him when he moved to Canada such as “You will not find a job in your field”, “You will not be able to have a senior position if you want to settle here”,” You will need to adjust your expectations downwards” etc etc. He then proceeded to proudly share that “He was glad he only listened to himself” as he was now on the Board of Directors of a reputable organisation within that year.

I assume most of us have come across such situations in our personal & professional lives where we are faced with similar statements/doubts expressed on capabilities. There can be one of three outcomes in such a situation:

1) Get demotivated/stop attempting

2) Not affected/carry on as planned

3) Challenge becomes a huge motivation/multiply the effort.

In my personal experience these have actually proved to be huge motivators to try to accomplish what has been stated as “can’t be done”. Granted that subject to limits of science and supernatural not everything will be possible but hope you get my gist:-).

It was the year 1993, I had just given my year 10 exams ( sort of equivalent to GCSEs) and had about 4 months of holidays coming up. Although it has been quite common for 14+ year olds taking up jobs in Europe, Americas etc., in the Northern Indian town of Faridabad where I grew up it was almost unheard of ( landscape has changed a bit over the last decade or so but still not common) due to multiple factors such as too young, family reputation, limited belief in capability etc.

However, in very simple terms, in my heart I wanted to learn the value of money and expressed a desire to my family that I wanted to work . You guessed the response right…”You can’t do it”. The third outcome as above kicked in and I stepped up efforts to find a way. As luck would have it, found out about a boy known to my family who I learned had starting going to Delhi as he had taken up a job there. Spoke to him and was told that he works for a toy company. Somehow convinced my father to accompany this boy called Happy for one day and see if it was something decent to be involved in.

As agreed with Happy, I reached his home the next day at 7:30 AM to go to Delhi with him. Not sure why, but surprise surprise, he had left without me. Now definitely couldn’t just go back home and miss this golden chance and in those days there were no cell phones so couldn’t contact Happy either. I remembered Happy had told me that the company he works for is based in “East of Kailash”area in Delhi and had shared the company name. Armed with these 2 pieces of information, without ever having travelled alone to Delhi and that too on Public transport, I headed for the old Faridabad train station( Google hadn’t graced our lives yet:-)). At the station enquired about the train stop I should get off at in Delhi to reach East of Kailash and learned about Okhla, my destination station for the day. Once I reached East of Kailash ( it was not a couple of blocks, more like a small town), I started enquiring about this Toy company and after about an hour, luck smiled and a phone shop( called STD/ISD booths in India) which this toy company used to route their long distance calls gave me their address. Late morning, I arrived at A3-East of Kailash, which was originally a house but now had offices in the basement & ground floor and someone’s residence on the upper floors. The toy company’s office was in the basement. When I entered the office, my friend Happy was there and was suitably surprised. Anyway, spoke to the boss and found out that this particular office employed people for door to door selling of their Soft toys and board games. They said they would give me a trial for a week and I jumped on the chance.

So that day in April 1993, armed with around 20kgs of toys and games on my shoulder, with a desire to learn and motivated further by “You can’t do it”, at a grand age of 15, on the streets of South Delhi was my first day at work! The journey of a salesman had begun.

That day defined my life. I ended up working there for the remaining 3 months and that is where my love for Sales was born. There are many other memories of knocking on doors, my first sale etc. which I might share in future posts. Since then, there had to be a component of work along with my studies and I ended up working part-time all through my graduation in Sales roles. Most of the times “You Can’t do it” challenge has worked positively for me as a motivator and also as a catalyst to help push boundaries, get out of comfort zone etc on multiple occasions. It is not surprising that the same must have played a huge role in the lives of many people we have come to respect such as Muhammad Ali, Nelson Mandela, Richard Branson etc. and must be a key ingredient in their success.

So next time, someone says to you” You can’t do it”.. just say and feel “That’s Wonderful!” 

Ankur Shiv Bhandari

Speak-to-your-fear-and-see-it-disappear

Speak to your fear and see it disappear – The Positive Charge Talks by Ankur Shiv Bhandari – Episode 06

In this episode, Ankur talks about the power of acknowledging our fears and overcoming them on the path to positivity and possibility.

#capability #ankurshivbhandari #thepositivecharge #beingpositive #happiness #positivemind #powerofpositivity #holisticcapability #beinghappy #positivity #motivation #inspiration #personaldevelopment #resilience #leadership

Is this what you really want? - The Positive Charge Talks by Ankur Shiv Bhandari - Episode 1

There is only 1 you, Live it, Love it and Launch it! – The Positive Charge Talks by Ankur Shiv Bhandari – Episode 05

In this episode, Ankur talks about the importance of feeling proud of one’s uniqueness. He highlights a key point that everyone is unique and that should be celebrated.

#capability #ankurshivbhandari #thepositivecharge #beingpositive #happiness #positivemind #powerofpositivity #holisticcapability #beinghappy #positivity #motivation #inspiration #personaldevelopment #resilience #leadership

There-is-a-Teacher-everywhere.-Are-you-learning

There is a Teacher everywhere. Are you learning?- The Positive Charge Talks by Ankur Shiv Bhandari – Episode 04

In this episode of The Positive Charge, Ankur shares the importance of absorbing learning from all sources to energise our souls and bring the Power of Positivity and Possibility in our lives.

#capability #ankurshivbhandari #thepositivecharge #beingpositive #happiness #positivemind #powerofpositivity #holisticcapability #beinghappy #positivity #motivation #inspiration #personaldevelopment #resilience #leadership

Falling-means-you-dared-to-go-high

Falling means you dared to go high – The Positive Charge Talks by Ankur Shiv Bhandari – Episode 03

In this episode of The Positive Charge, Ankur talks about the importance of pursuing your ambitions bravely.

#capability #ankurshivbhandari #thepositivecharge #beingpositive #happiness #positivemind #powerofpositivity #holisticcapability #beinghappy #positivity #motivation #inspiration #personaldevelopment #resilience #leadership

It-is-your-Duty-to-be-Happy

It is your Duty to be Happy – The Positive Charge Talks by Ankur Shiv Bhandari – Episode 02

In this episode, Ankur focuses on the importance of Happiness and correlates happiness with other desires in life.

#capability #ankurshivbhandari #thepositivecharge #beingpositive #happiness #positivemind #powerofpositivity #holisticcapability #beinghappy #positivity #motivation #inspiration #personaldevelopment #resilience #leadership

Is-this-what-you-really-want

Is this what you really want? – The Positive Charge Talks by Ankur Shiv Bhandari – Episode 1

Pleased to share the first episode of “The Positive Charge” podcast by yours truly. An effort to share how the Power of Positivity & Possibility can influence our lives. You can listen to it here on Spotify. The podcast is also available on other major sites includes Apple Podcasts.

#capability #ankurshivbhandari #thepositivecharge #beingpositive #happiness #positivemind #powerofpositivity #holisticcapability #beinghappy #positivity #motivation #inspiration #personaldevelopment #resilience #leadership

The-Positive-Charge-Talks

“The Positive Charge” Talks by Ankur Shiv Bhandari – Coming Soon!

I have been involved in Capability building for more than a decade not only as part of leading a training company but by also being a Corporate trainer, managing people from different cultures, as a father and recently as a University Senior lecturer. As the years have gone by, I have realised the pure joy there is when you see even a small positive change in someone’s capability and the feeling that your efforts might have contributed to it in some way. I believe that an underlying “Hygiene factor” or “success factor” to how individuals and organisations approach capability is the level of optimism and the ability to deal with negative or discouraging events and influences. I believe if a situation is approached with a “Positive Charge” the capability change results are amazingly different. I will try to share some thoughts on that point through “The Positive Charge” podcast. Thoughts related to the Industry will continue on “The Shopper in Shorts” podcast.

If you are interested you can follow my personal Social Media channels and pages on YouTube, LinkedIn, FB & Twitter for getting notified when episodes launch.

Look forward to connecting with thoughts soon

#capability #ankurshivbhandari #thepositivecharge #beingpositive #happiness #positivemind #powerofpositivity #holisticcapability #beinghappy #positivity #motivation #inspiration #personaldevelopment #resilience #leadership

Speak to your fear and see it disappear – That’s Me Talks by Ankur Shiv Bhandari – Episode 6

In this episode, Ankur talks about the power of acknowledging our fears and overcoming them on the path to positivity and possibility.

(Asbicon is a Shopper focused “Sales & Marketing Support Company” catering to the Consumer Goods and Services sector. Asbicon enables this through its 7 verticals of Capability Development, Dezign Services, Data Services, Research, Assisted Advisory, IT Solutions and Digital Marketing providing Retail & Distribution effectiveness to its clients.)